Monday, August 16, 2010

Short notice

Dear Mon,

So I heard you wrote your possibly last entry. I've considered many things to say about this statement, but nothing stands out. Does this mean that I've become indifferent of the situation? Possibly.

Looking back on this project, I don't have many fond memories. You did break some news to me more smoothly this way than you could orally, but I've mostly kept to myself. It's as if I've suddenly become aware of the people who read this after I've finished writing. You must feel the same, from what I can gather.

However, I don't believe this is the end. It cannot be the end. After a dead period, you brought this blogging project back to life. I enjoyed reading about what was happening in your life, and as you enter your first year of college, you'll understand why it was difficult for me to write as frequently as you. As a sophomore, I have become wiser about college, and my experiences of the past can help guide you this year.

You've taken the burden of writing during your (high school) senior year and told me of your experiences. Well, now it's my turn.

Cosplay has been a big thing for me this this past year. It's a hobby I thoroughly enjoy, and it gives me time to continue the experience I began as a high school junior. While I do take this seriously, it could be worse.

I'll be looking forward to the car rides to and from school, but I want songs I know the words to. I would like to apologize for not communicating with you as often as we would both like. We've both been too occupied with personal vices and projects to make time for each other.

With more love than you can imagine,
Pita

Thursday, August 12, 2010

Iris

Dear Pita,

It's been a year since we started this, more or less, and I feel that it was slowly dying since we began. Are we just beating a dead horse, or am I just writing to myself really...I guess I could start over with a new blog and you could go off into the world and do your cosplays and things. I know it's sort of a bother to keep checking in on this, especially when I've written 4 or 5..or 20 between your entries. I guess what I really mean is that I wish we would just talk like normal people..

Today when I was driving you up to college to pick up your textbooks I realized 3 things, one of which you helped me see:

1) I'm turning into an adult whether or not I like it...and so are you. We're both in college now, so we'll have to take responsibility for all our own actions and take care of business, whatever that business may be, on time and as close to perfection as we can get it. I just hope it is easier for us both this year..

2) Whenever it's just you and me, no distractions, no computers, no other people...You act like one of my best friends. I don't get it. Why can't you always be like that? I certainly enjoy it a lot more, and it makes me feel less...lonely. I guess it's kind of my own fault for not being more sociable, but I think what tipped me off was that you almost threatened to kill me because I almost revealed a cosplay.

A cosplay...seriously? I mean, I know I was being a little mean, but it was a bit of an overreaction.

3) You told me today that maybe the reason I've been a little meaner is because I have more confidence. WHAT?!?! Never D:> I can't have confidence! It seems terrible, especially if it turned me into this kind of person. I don't like it very much...but I have always wanted confidence..and I guess now that I have it I have to turn it into something not so scary. I believe in the you that believes in me, and we'll make it through college alive. I know it.

Pita, I love you very much, whether or not I say so. Rather, I love the you that is being truly yourself, the you that hangs out with me and dances in the car to various Perfume songs and tells me not to dance while I'm driving XD It's so much fun. I can't wait for the early morning drives we will have to college, because I get to talk to you in the way I used to be able to.

It's gonna be awesome. I just wish my life was like a movie and had theme songs and mood music...because I know when we're having fun, I can just imagine the sound in the scene fading out and you hear "Iris" by Tomohito Nishiura playing. It's just like a reminiscent song...and possibly one of the many songs that could be the soundtrack of my life XD I would make that CD to listen to, but my life isn't over yet. We'll have to wait and see..

I hope college is good to you, sis. And if you need me to beat someone up, just point em out. ^w^ This may very well be my last entry. It's been fun.

Love,
Monchan

Monday, August 2, 2010

Of owls, bears, and the butterflies in my stomach

Dear Mon,

I must admit, I haven't been the best blogger when it comes to this particular commitment. In my spare time, I've been spending more time with Facebook and deviantART than I have with other things. For instance, I've had an idea brewing for months, yet I haven't gotten around to actually drawing it more or writing it down in a short story. In fact, I have reason to believe that my "book" is going to be a collection of short stories.

What amazes me is the amount of books that are written these days. I know at least three people who are writing books, and it's interesting to think each of us has the same chance of "making it big." However, my passion lies more in drawing than writing, and since my artist's block, that passion will have to be put at bay for the moment.



One story I've considered writing was about a Tawny Owl named Owain. A native to the forest-clad nation of Rosewood, the young fledgling had an unquenchable thirst for knowledge. He decided to become a scholar once he learned to fly and started his vocation in the monastery of Fron, a rather remote place amongst the mountains bordering Rosewood and Carrol.

He began his studies with his country's folklore and legends. However, a fear of not being satisfied began to creep into Owain's heart. He decided to take a break from his studies and explore a bit of the land below the mountains to clear his thoughts. Sadly, he got lost in the Tangled Woods. In these woods, he discovers a treasure he only began reading about in his books. What happens next...is something I'm trying to figure out at the moment.

Back to real life, I believe my relationship with the Bear is relatively healthy. We talk to each other about anything and everything, our interests are similar enough to keep things mutual but distinct enough to keep topics fresh and interesting. Mostly, it's about "us," but there are times when it's about "him" and sometimes about "her." Communication is successful in this relationship, and that obstacle isn't a problem for me anymore.

The one thing I'm a little antsy about are these butterflies in my stomach. I'm getting them more often when I'm around him, and I miss him when I'm not. Hopefully we can hang out again before school starts.

With anticipation,
Pita

Monday, July 12, 2010

Moderately Sociable Sometimes Maybe

Dear Pita,

I know you barely ever read this...But today was a pretty normal day. Well, maybe I should start from many days ago.

I went to a battle of the bands with Molly to watch her sister sing. Apparently she has a band, rather, she's in a band. Either way, it was freaking awesome. I wish I was talented enough to be in a band. Anyways, it ended around mosquito time. I should know because I was being eaten by mosquitoes (actually it was around 9 or so). So after our goodbyes, Molly took Rachel (a different one) back to her house whilst we sung at the top of our lungs to "I Believe In A Thing Called Love" by The Darkness. Its such a cute song...and it reminds me of someone that I shouldn't think about. But anyways, she took me home and we were kinda early, so we sat in the car and talked. I must say she is one of the few people I have ever just...talked to and not been awkward.

I like it a lot.

Next day I was going to the movies with Adam, his boyfriend Matt, and BUDDY!!! (who's real name is Ischelle, but I call her Buddy for reasons that Molly has never explained to me..) We went to see "Despicable Me" and it was quite, quite lovely. I almost cried three times, because I'm secretly not as manly as I say I am..waaah. And also we went to World Market and bought Japanese candeh! So now I can get fat and no one will marry me except two Kyles and a Randi (no offense to them, but I'm sure they would be happier with someone else..) We also went to the lakefront where I walked along this weird thing in the water out towards this lamp (and this weird ..walkway thing was quite slimy), but I only got halfway when Adam told me that I might get arrested..Haha, sorry. By then it was so dark out that we decided we should be heading home, plus Adam told his Dad he'd be home by 11.

We started driving back and then we came across this black man on a bike. For some reason I said something along the lines of, "We should follow him!" And so we did..Until he so cleverly got onto a bike trail where vehicles aren't allowed. Oh, we'll get you one day, Man On A Bike..Adam suddenly peeled out of the road and tried to drive around, but by the time we got to the other side he was gone. After a long and intelligent conversation, we decided that black Leprechauns (sp?) are scary. (I'm not sure why, and I hope this doesn't offend anyone.)

So yeah..and then the NEXT day Max came over to try on his Silent Hill nurse outfit I was making for him, because I wanted to be helpful, but then I realized my own costume needs today..and I'm cutting it kinda close. I will finish at least one nurse outfit, I know that much. Aria also came over and we had a sleepover!! Which I haven't had in forever, since the last time I saw Jamie, rather...And we just talked a lot about music, stories, and how much guys suck butt. I also caught on that she and Quinn wanted to be alone for a while, so I "went to bed", even though I didn't sleep for a good hour or so afterwords.

TODAY I went to Rachel's house!! (The one you know, who loves Silent Hill, of course) We made most of her Silent Hill nurse costume, and now I only have to make her hat and possibly the mask...though I think she was going to do that. Either way, I had a lot of fun..Oh yes! I also got my driver's license. I feel like I'm actually turning into an adult, which I don't want to, because it means that if I act like a kid then no one will respect me..and I don't want that to happen.

Yeah, that's been my week so far, pretty hectic, at least, very eventful..I'm not sure what's in store for tomorrow, but it better be costume makings, at the very least. I WILL finish Black Rock Shooter. I swears it. Or I will commit seppukku. Yes yes..

Well, maybe not literally, but I certainly will never cosplay again if I don't finish one decent one.

That is all. See you on Thursday!

Love,
Monchan

Saturday, July 3, 2010

Keep Your Head Up!

Dear Pita,

It's been a little while since I wrote in here, even though you never read this, and yet you can be on the computer for hours upon hours. I mean, I'm not complaining since some of the stuff I put on here is kinda weird...and personal...(cough cough)ANYWHO, as you know I got a new phone since my last one (which was my first phone evuh T_T ) got unfortunately dropped into the..erm, washing machine. I like doing laundry! So what?!

But, yeah..and you were kind enough to resend me possibly my favorite text message I've ever gotten (other than my first one) which happened to have a loverly picture of Liam Neeson. Of COURSE I had to set this as my background, so now every time I go to read a text message I see his eyes staring into my soul calmly, almost as if to say, "Yeah, that's right, I'm in your phone looking at you're things...and you love it." I do, I really do..Oh my, why do I always have a crush on significantly older men with facial hair? I'm such a perverted old gay man..No matter how you deny it. And yet I don't like yaoi. (shudders)

Yup yup, I'm weird. Haha, I know I should never listen to the interwebs, but I kept finding sites that said I shouldn't talk to someone I just broke up with in order to get over them, but I still talk to him, and we're cool...if that makes sense. I mean like, it's back to good ol' times. We just kinda chat about stuff that's been going on and how I'm totally gonna kick his butt at Pokemon. Ah, but I think I messed up...Everytime he gets off the phone he says, "Bye beautiful." and of course this makes me blush like heck because..well, yeah. And then I told him not to say it and he asked me why. I told him...I TOLD him I was gonna hang up if I said why, and he still wanted to know..so I told him it makes me blush, and I still love him..

Click.

Then after about 5 minutes he texted me just starting off a normal conversation again. He brought up my "answer", but I told him not to say anything over a text, because it's just not the same, you know? So he said, "Until the next time we talk.." so now of course I'm SUPAH NERVOUS to even talk to him at all. God, I put myself into awkward situations..I'm pretty sure I'm the personification of awkwardness, but then again that's what my friend Adam says he is, so maybe I should fight him for the title. But no matter what happens, I'll keep my head up!

Ah yes! And your birthday is coming up, missy!!! You'll be a grand ol' 19. Not sure if there's much special about being 19..other than that you're not 18 anymore and you're almost 20..but who cares! You're freaking 19!!!!!!!!!! (Too many exclamation points) Yeah, and we'll get to go see "Despicable Me" on July 9th with the wonderful Adam and his boyfriend Matt. How cute...I wish I was a gay man, then I could marry Mark..haha, then again, I'm sure he'd find me annoying..Ah well.

Sorry I'm so random. I hope you like the CD I'm making for you. Shhhh! It's a surprise. Happy sleepy times!

Love,
Monchan

Wednesday, June 23, 2010

The Part Where You Let Go

Dear Pita,

I guess that's it...

A moment ago I broke up with Kris.

It's not for any sort of stupid reason, like he has smelly feet or snores or maybe he had another lady friend on the side. No, we decided that if it was meant to be then it would happen, and that just as best friends we don't have additional stress of wanting to be with each other all the time. However, he admitted that he will always love me, and I'll always love him..

But now we're just friends, and for some reason it's not as painful as I thought it was going to be. He's still really close to me and I guess that's what I really wanted. To be close to him...Anyways, we're both on good terms, so there's nothing to worry about. Haha, I told him I could wait, and he said I shouldn't...but he's waiting too.

Oh, Pita, this may hurt in time, but just knowing that this wasn't messy and we can still talk has meant everything in the world to me. I hope this entry isn't too boring compared to my last entries XD I apologize sincerely. Oh my, I don't know how to break it to everyone, or maybe I just won't. Maybe I'll tell everyone that I'm still in a relationship, but not give all the details. I can still visit him though, we agreed upon that. He has no intention at all of not hanging out with me. I'm so glad. I think the only bad thing is that I won't be able to kiss him...or hold his hand...or tell him I love him, at least, I can't mean it the way that I mean it.

But it's all okay. Thanks for listening..

Love,
Monchan

Tuesday, June 22, 2010

My Goodness, Woman

Dear Pita,

Make up your mind and post something!!! DX I keep finding drafts here and there and I don't know whether to delete them due to my selective OCD or leave them because you might want to finish them.

(Sigh) Well, anyways, I read the last draft you left, at least, what little was in it, and I'm happy you had fun that the weekend before last. I heard that you were also going to be staying up there this weekend as well, so I am doubly happy for you! You don't have to worry about me and You-Know-Who because, let's face it...It probably won't be getting any better. But I can still has hopes! Yes yes, and I shall for as long as I am not demoted, rather, promoted to crazy cat lady. I have decided that when i retire I will become a crazy cat lady, and they can't have significant others anyways, so...Problem solved!

I can also become a fantabulous Pokemon trainer and professional cosplayer/hobo/artist. I do believe that is a wonderful life goal, wouldn't you say so? I can never be sad now, because I know that no matter what happens, I will always have a backup plan! Mwahahahaa! Ooh! That reminds me...I wonder if I can get all my cosplays finished in time D:> I need to start working on them super soon..AND I have to work on some stuff for Morgan's art table! I don't want her to have to make a ton of stuff. It would be terribly inconvenient to carry. Plus, I want to feel helpful. I'm so selfish...

This journal may be pretty short because as of right now I just don't know what to say...I keep listening to music, though, which means I haven't gone completely insane. But don't fret! Have fun at campy, and I'll see you next weekend :3

Love,
Monchan